When people in our lives endure tragedies, we naturally try to find the right words to say to them. We want to be encouraging; we want to uplift them with words that inspire confidence. This is especially true for the Christian, as a tragedy can put one’s faith on the edge of a cliff. Armed with the knowledge of how greatly our words matter, one thing we might say is this: “everything happens for a reason.” Tragedies feel more bearable with a change in mindset, and this statement seems to provide comfort and focus during times of trouble.
However, as is always the case, we need to ensure that our words of comfort are also words of truth. “Everything happens for a reason” is an easy-to-reach phrase that gets us out of uncomfortable silences and makes us feel helpful in the same moment. But no Band-Aid can fix a broken bone, and questionable advice cannot heal a broken heart. With that in mind, let’s raise the needed question: is it actually true that everything happens for a reason? Well, yes and no.
To begin, many things—positive and negative—do happen for a reason. If you pass an exam, for example, it’s hopefully because you’ve studied for it. At the same time, if you fail the exam, it is likely because you are underprepared. There are more serious applications of this principle, though, as I’m sure you are aware. If someone is murdered, the reason is because someone committed murder. If a natural disaster occurs, the reason can be explained by meteorologists or seismologists. These are tragedies, and they do have reasons—generally regarding someone or something that caused it, animate or inanimate.
However, when we ask this question, we are generally referring to a “reason” as in a “higher purpose” caused by a “higher power.” This conflation of concepts—mixing up our terms—is part of the issue. Being stung by a wasp has a reason, in that the wasp stung you. Maybe you provoked it, or maybe it was just a mean wasp. But just because there is a causative reason for something does not mean there is a higher purpose for it. In other words, don’t assume God caused the wasp to sting you in order to teach you a spiritual lesson.
Related to this is the sovereignty of God. God is sovereign, but we have to be careful in how we explain that. God certainly has the power to control every wasp. He also can control your every thought, word, and action—but He doesn’t. He desires for you to make holy choices, informed by His word, of your own accord. Instead of forcing you, He wants you to willingly live for Him. That’s what He wants from all of us. There are, indeed, events that will happen by God’s will no matter what, such as the final judgment. However, God gives you the choice as to what you will do beforehand.
But this is a lot of theory. What matters most is what the Bible says, and I want to examine a few passages with you. This study is not meant to be exhaustive, but to be an entryway for you to think about this question more deeply. Does everything really happen for a reason? Perhaps the most often quoted passage regarding this idea is Romans 8:28.
And we know that, for those who love God and are called according to his purpose, all things work together for good.1
As always, we should be careful about reading a verse in isolation. Before drawing conclusions, let’s first consider the context, which, in the case of this verse, concerns redemption. The verses immediately following verse 28 discuss how God foreknew and predestined that Christians would be “resembling” or “conformed to” the image of Christ, and that God can use every suffering we endure to draw us closer to that goal (see vv. 37–38). God desires that we continually become more like Christ. That is a key purpose to our lives.
Second, let’s pay attention to the beneficiaries of this promise. Verse 28 does not only say “all things work together for good.” It says that “all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose.” Christians are promised that the tragedies in their lives can have a purpose. They do not have to be meaningless sufferings. Disciples of Jesus can grow; they can learn! This is not a promise for everyone, but for Christians.
The third clarification here is that there is a difference between everything working together for good and everything innately being good. In other words, there are some events and situations that are outright senseless. Horrid crimes are committed every day, many of which without any positive outlook. Not everything is innately good, but everything is able to “work together” for good. The kinds of sufferings that Paul lists throughout the rest of Romans 8 are not good in and of themselves. It is that they work to the higher goal of becoming like Christ that allows them to work together for good.
To tie all this together, Romans 8:28 is not teaching that everything happens for a reason, but that everything that happens can be for a reason. Bear in mind, though, that the potential reason can only be discerned by “those who love God and are called according to his purpose.” Even still, it is difficult to know those reasons with certainty—especially in the moment—apart from what the Bible teaches about progression toward greater Christlikeness. I recognize that this is challenging, but consider this. Take Joseph, who was sold into slavery by his brothers. Genesis 50:20 is perhaps the most well-known verse of the entire Joseph account:
But as for you, you planned evil against me; God planned it for good, for the sake of saving many peoples’ lives, as he is doing today.
This verse is a testament to God’s providence, but what if Joseph had responded differently to his suffering? What if, instead of saving his brothers, he had been plotting revenge? What if he had used his powerful position to starve or even kill them? Suddenly, the sad events of Joseph’s life would no longer seem providential—they would just have been senseless tragedies. You see, the reason for Joseph’s sufferings—the “higher purpose,” if you will—came from how he responded to those sufferings. If a person responds to difficult situations in a God-honoring way, then reason is found.
This understanding should help us to respond to other peoples’ hardships in a more careful way. If a child is being viciously bullied, it’s unhelpful to tell them, “well, at least you’re stronger from the experience.” That may be true—but we should neither romanticize nor minimize the sufferings of others to quiet their pain. To offer another example, if a couple you know loses a child, it is downright destructive to say something like, “Heaven just needed another angel.” Not only is that idea theologically false, it provides no actual comfort to the mourning family. Sometimes, we as Christians feel as though we need to water down the truth in order to connect with others, but truth must go hand-in-hand with comfort. A well-packaged lie, even tied up with good intentions, is not a gift—it’s a burden.
Saying that everything happens for a reason is, unfortunately, equally dismissive. It communicates to the hurting that they ought to have the spiritual maturity to see the larger reason for their circumstances—even if there is not a larger reason. It mistakens the biblical reality of providence with the idea that God Himself purposefully sends every criminal, natural disaster, and other hardship by His command. While we think that expression helps our faith, it only hurts it. It communicates, often without our realizing it, that God Himself is directly responsible for what we went through. While a situation can be used by God, that does not necessarily mean that it was done by God.
There are some relevant cross-references to help us understand this. 1 Peter 1:6–9 describes trials as building us up. They train us and edify us for the return of Christ and our inheritance in heaven. James 1 offers several words on the matter. In verse 2 he says, “Consider it all joy, my brothers, when you fall into trials of various kinds.” By “various kinds,” he truly means “various kinds.” It’s not just about the massive tragedies, but the seemingly small hardships, too. James goes on to say that we grow in our Christian character as a result of trials. We can grow from them all. Verse 12 of the same chapter reads, “Blessed is the man who endures trial, for he—when approved—will receive the crown of life which is promised to those who love him.” A corresponding promise of the limitations of suffering is found in 1 Corinthians 10:13, that we will not be “tested” or “tempted” beyond what we are able. All of these sufferings are light in comparison to what awaits us (2 Corinthians 4:17), and they allow us to draw nearer to that promise. Despite the number of passages that speak to this idea, we must ensure—especially with a topic as emotional as this—that we are honoring their contexts.
That said, here’s the point: it is pleasing to God when we endure through trial. His purpose flourishes when an otherwise senseless tragedy is morphed into a transformative showcase of His providence. We are but insignificant human beings, yet God’s love for us allows for wonderful turnarounds from our tragedies. Whether we suffer due to persecution for the gospel, general mistreatment from others, sickness, or any other coincidental event of life, we can trust that God allows us opportunities for growth and maturation from those experiences. Whether there is a discernible reason for our sufferings is determined by how we respond to them.
So, does everything happen for a reason? Again, yes and no. It is the case that God knows everything before it happens. It is not the case, however, that every incident of our lives has some preplanned, divine lesson behind it. Yet, at the same time, certain things do. The Bible teaches that God presents us with situations that allow us to grow into more Christlike individuals. This is all to say that while many things happen for a reason by way of a cause, there are far fewer things that definitively happen for a higher purpose, as our response makes all the difference. Of course, there is a need for nuance and humility in all of this. Otherwise, you will wind up like Job and his three friends, speculating and posturing as though you have all the answers. Be careful what you say to grieving loved ones. Be sympathetic and comforting to them. Though a statement like “everything happens for a reason” may seem helpful, it is both unhelpful and potentially harmful—if not properly nuanced.
I recognize that we say phrases like that to inspire hope. That’s noble! When we try to help others find the meaning to their tragedies, we might be able to give them the hope that their suffering isn’t meaningless and that God hasn’t forgotten them. However, our hope in tragedy should not come from these kinds of statements, but in the trustworthy nature of God. Remember that the latter part of Romans 8 is all about the fact that no hardship separates us from the love of God. That’s the point! Despite the need for clarifications, Romans 8:28 is unequivocally telling the truth:
And we know that, for those who love God and are called according to his purpose, all things work together for good.
Take heart that God is with you, and that He cares for you (Philippians 4:6–7).
Ultimately, devoting your life to the Lord does not guarantee a higher meaning to every hardship, but it offers meaning where meaning would be otherwise nonexistent. In other words, our trust in God provides the hope that our hardships are working toward our spiritual betterment. Meaning is not found in isolated events. God’s love, and our love for God, allow for meaning. Like Joseph, we must allow God’s providence to flourish by responding to our tragedies in a God-honoring way.
- Scripture quotations in this study are the author’s. ↩︎